We were trying to work out what this reminded us of.
And the answer was in the same place it usually is.
It all checks out. The SNP spend their time grooming your children and trying to make basic parenting a crime. They endorse “gender-affirming care” that sterilises them and will stop them ever having an orgasm as adults. And they want you to stop enjoying almost all of the small things that make life pleasurable.
Even porridge.
(Shortbread is also on the forbidden list, although haggis, in most cases, escapes for now. The Scottish Government IS, however, keen to decriminalise heroin – presumably because unlike most legal recreational substances it’s a highly solitary and anti-social pursuit – so you’ll get in less trouble if you’re caught with some of that in your pocket than if you try to furtively slip your child a Twix or buy a box of Frosties.)
The more traditional, social forms of escape may be severely frowned upon:
But “the intoxication of power”, as Orwell put it, will always be available to the poor downtrodden public. Scottish Labour, the Tories and Reform will always be there to be defeated again. Like knuckle-dragging Celtic and “Rangers” fans who only care about beating their rivals no matter how much of a trainwreck their own club is, there’ll always be time for party’s remaining members to release their frustrations during the Two Minutes’ Hate.
Conference is coming up, after all. They’ll be very excited, but only within supervised, controllable and highly limited parameters. Which will pretty soon be the only form of excitement still allowed in Scotland.
